Doormat…
Things have been hectic this week. First, the last minute prep for Red Bull Flugtag, and the upcoming campus tour this week. So haven’t had much breathing space.
I had a relaxing Thursday otherwise. Well, as relaxing as I could possibly get. I spent some time with P. He’s getting to be an annoying habit. Although I do appreciate and enjoy the attention and care he gives me. I need that sort of a male figure in my life right now – someone who’s mature and knowns how to push the right buttons and support me emotionally.
Because emotionally, I’m reaching a breaking point with mom and sis. They both are leaning on me so much that I’m not sure if I can take it anymore. Ok, I don’t really expect much beyond appreciation. I took mom to Zulekha at odd hours and am still taking care of her and who does she name as her ICE on the registration form? My ex-stepdad! Fine, why doesn’t he take her to wherever she wants to go?! Why ask me?! And yes, she wants me to call him Pappa again. As if. He’s lost whatever respect I had for him. I’m never really going to forgive him for what he did to ma. He’s not even moved back in yet. And I doubt he will. Bastard. I hate him.
Anger aside, eye-candy and I are getting closer as friends. But I’ve dropped the idea of trying to go beyond friendship. As I’m getting to know him, I sense a sort of naiveness and purity in him which I don’t want to corrupt or ruin by going further. First of all, I highly doubt he’d approach me. And two, I’m too dark and twisted to be able to match him. So friends it is. Although my heart-strings get pulled everytime I see him…he is sooooooooo damn cute. *sigh* *double sigh*
I gotta run now. Laters…
Head-Pounds…
My head hurts. I know it’s been a while since I’ve blogged, but I’ve been busy. And anxious about something. I can’t say right now as I wouldn’t want to jinx it, but I will let you know the big secret by the end of this week.
Back to my headache. I don’t know why I feel dizzy and nauseous all the time. And my stomach heats up so fast that I rush to the loo or throw up. Not good. Have only been having liquids and milkshakes in an attempt to cool my tummy.
A very close friend of mine, P, lost his job. Considering the way he got dismissed I’d say the workplace was bad news, but otherwise my heart goes out to him. I spent time with him and tried cheering him up. We have a really weird friendship. Not going to discuss more about this though as giving thought to it will make my head hurt even more. I think it was the rum I had yesterday….
I bought a new book, “It’s Called a Break-up Because It’s Broken”. Should be an interesting read. Anyway, I need to go cook now and stop my the hammers in my head from pounding so laters.
PS: Singstar Bollywood and Buzz! game totally rock!
Hapy Butt-day Zed…
It’s past midnight and happy butt-day bub!!!! I love you!!!! *mwah*
Day 2…
Was feeling a bit down today. Probably because I’m exhausted from the long hours. And plus my hormones are kicking in. There’s a good chance I might be getting a visit from an unpleasant aunt soon…
We finally got our logo up. And the Shoof-booth is turning into a confessional booth. Quite fun really. Check out the website in a few days to see stuff from the ‘Shoof booth’.
Saw eye-candy when I headed back to work later on in the day. He’s as cute as ever. And I actually went up to him and said hello even when other people were around. And I smiled sweetly and asked him if I could convince him to take a ‘break’ while I hi-jack his machine for a few minutes to copy my files off the main server. And he did. 
*sigh* There’s one thing I’ve been dying to ask him. Guess. No really, take a wild guess. No, it isn’t something on the lines of wanting to know him more or get closer. But more like ‘Is that your real eye color or are those lenses?’ :S Yep, I’m fascinated by eyes but I can’t decide whether they’re real or not. And I’m generally a good judge of lenses. Maybe because if I stare at his eyes too long he’ll think I’m retarded. hmmmm….
It’s now 1am and I better go catch some Zzzzzzzz’s for tomorrow. Adios amigos.
Saawariya: A Blue Film…
Did a back-to-back this Saturday with sissy. Watched Saawariya and Om Shanti Om (or OSO for short). Thank goodness I chose to go for Saawariya first. Because it turned out to be a blue film. Everything was a shade or hint of blue. I felt blue and monochromatic after watching the movie.
Although I enjoyed the artistic value and lush cinematography of the movie, I was a little disappointed. Ranbir was decent, although a tad cock-eyed every time he’d gawk at lady love Sonam. And Sonam….Sonam darling. She played a psychotic bitch that kept running towards a dripping wet bridge every time the clock struck midnight. I suppose the only highlight of the movie was Rani playing a hooker…again.
That aside, I enjoyed OSO soooo much more. I didn’t feel like the world existed in hues of blue. Rather, I was taken back to the colorful 70’s and Bollywood masala films. I always admired Farah Khan’s flicks and add her in my list of directors I aspire to be. OSO was definitely better than her first film. And the song Main Agar Kahoon haunts me…it’s a beautiful slow tune, but gives chills down my spine for some reason.
I’m sleepy. And my feet hurt. And my shoulder, neck and back. I’ll go crash now. Laters.
Low…
I love this girl…all her songs touch me in ways that no other songs can describe:
Before I give the lyrics, this goes to every person who’s betrayed me, be it friends or men…every person who took me for a ride and fucked up my trust…especially the highlighted bits:
Everybody’s talking
But they don’t say a thing
They look at me with sad eyes
But I don’t want the sympathy
Its cool you didn’t want me
Sometimes you can’t go back
But why’d you have to go and make a mess like that
Well I just have to say
Before I let go
Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
When the truth came out
Were you the last to know?
Were you left out in the cold?
What you did was low
No I don’t need your number
There’s nothing left to say
Except I never thought it’d hurt this much to be saved
My friends are outside waiting
I’ve gotta go
Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
When the truth came out
Were you the last to know?
Were you left out in the cold?
What you did was low
What you did was low (low)
What you did was low (low)
What you did was low (low)
I walk out of this darkness
With no sense of regret
And I go with a clear conscience
We both know that you can’t say that
Here’s to show
For all the time I loved you so…
So…
Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
When the truth came out
Were you the last to know?
Were you left out in the cold?
What you did was low
Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
When the truth came out
Were you the last to know?
Were you left out in the cold?
What you did was low
Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
Cuz what you did was low
Reading of the day – Vampire’s Kiss Spread
Position 1 – Knave of Swords
Position 2 – Reversed Six of Swords
Position 3 – Knight of Wands
Position 4 – Reversed Eight of Wands
Position 5 – Reversed King of Swords
Position 6 – Reversed Three of Swords
Position 7 – Reversed Queen of Swords
Will explain more later…
In the meanwhile, any tarot experts are free to comment on this spread, perhaps your own interpretations?
I Am Like This Braaaa-der!
Current song in my head:
Well, it’s been in my head since morning. So I hummed it all the way to work, at work, after work…and even now as we speak…hum to aise hai bhaiyaaaaaaaa…erm.
That being said, I loved the salwar-kameezes they were wearing. I want one too. Anyway, time for bed. Do you think I should post my daily tarot reading…kinda like a tarot journal too? I’ll think about that a little more…
Zzzzzzz….
It’s 3pm…for once. And I’m really sleepy. Have to finish burning DVDs though. Might be a long day…again.
Anyway, yesterday was an eventful day. Firstly, I was stuck at work till the wee hours of the morning trying to get some stuff ready for the upcoming Media & Marketing Show on the 11th.
And I finally got my beyoooooo-tiful Tarot cards that I ordered from Monolith Graphics. I was surprised that they got here within a week. Anyway, the MTV peeps saw them too and I practiced my first readings on them. Came out eerily close to the truth.
I also read eye-candy’s cards. And I guess the perks of working late are having less people around and a chance to chat up eye-candy. Turns out he’s just a few months younger than me. And that he’s a Karachi-ite (damn) and umm…loads of things. And his eyes….*sigh* they are so…hazel. Jobless me. That being said, atleast I broke the ice and went beyond smiling as he passes by. I actually go and talk.
I also reached just in time for Binny’s farewell. I will miss her, even though I haven’t spent much time around her. She reminds me of Priyanka Chopra from Salaam-e-Ishq…drama queen.
Anyway, will probably write more if I’m staying back late. Till then…au revoir.
Eye-candy *sigh*
Seriously. Is it just me, or are there more people who Google other people to learn more about them? I found out eye-candy’s full name and email today..cos I got my new edit schedule. And so I googled him. And came across his portfolio and website. Impressive. He’s quite good as an editor. And also younger than me if his info is correct and updated.
*sigh* And so he remains as eye-candy…to be nothing more than a slight visual fest to break the monotony of converting the many video formats we come across…
Oh, I also bumped into him today while heading to the suite. And talked a bit more. Although I don’t think I was very successful at playing dumb-damsel-in-distress-in-the-edit-suite and I finally gave up on even trying to approach him anymore.
*sigh* I really need to make-out with someone very soon….
Also, note to self to stop acting in a borderline-stalker manner.
PS: He asked for a sharpener again…
